SOLD SEPARATELY

Well the threads on the porcelain throne wore out
Replacement time had come
So I took a drive to the plumbing store
To get a brand new one
I picked one out from the showroom floor
Paid with my mastercard
I set up a delivery date and headed for my car
And then I heard the question I still can't quite believe
Would you like a seat with that, it's sold separately

Well it didn't make sense that a toilet would come
Without a place to sit
But I said OK and used my mastercard to pay for it
But it made me think of all the products
And how much more they'd make me pay
When some part that I'd have to have to make it work
Is sold separately

Imagine that your buying a brand new care
You can't move it from it's parking spot
Because the tires that you have to have
Are on the other side of town in another lot
And what about the fancy ceiling fan
without the blades to move the air
Nothing's like the picture on the front of the box
Marketing is never fair
So again you'll ask the question
And the answer is the corporate decree
The part you need the most to make this work
Is sold separately

Next you'll a leaf rake without a single tine
A ladder that is missing all the rungs you need to climb
A dryer with no chord for electricity
Oh no my friend that part you need so desperately
Is sold separately

Batteries are not included
it's always been that way
There are no action figures
in the toy with which you want to play
And somewhere in that corporate world
They decided to propagate
Creation of the missing link
For the money it would make
And once again the question
There is no mystery
The part you need the most to make something work
Is sold separately

Written by Michael Frazier © November 9, 2007